Your relationship with your mother and father shapes your identity. It can define your personality and how you forge relationships with other people. The person you are today reflects both the nurturing care of a mother and the guiding support of a father — or the pain you experienced at their hands. A parent’s love is a powerful thing, but so too are the wounds they can inflict on their children. The only perfect love comes from God. He embodies both maternal tenderness and fatherly strength, offering a complete, divine care that can heal the imperfections of human love.

In this episode of the Live from Rest podcast, Steve Smith welcomes Barry Adams, author of The Father’s Love Letter, for a moving conversation about the depth of God’s love and the healing power of forgiveness. Barry explores how parental wounds often shape our ability to experience God’s love and how forgiveness can release us from these barriers. Drawing from scripture and years of ministry, Barry reveals how God’s love encompasses both maternal and paternal qualities, offering a transformative vision of divine care.

This conversation is for anyone seeking a deeper understanding of God’s love or healing from unresolved pain tied to their upbringing.

Here are three reasons why you should listen to this episode:

1. Understand how parental wounds can shape your ability to experience God’s love.
2. Reflect on the dual nature of God’s love, which encompasses both maternal tenderness and fatherly strength.
3. Learn how Jesus reveals the heart of the Father, fulfilling humanity’s deepest longing for love, identity, and belonging.

Resources

• Live from Rest Podcast: Apple Podcasts | Spotify 
• Live from Rest App: Google Play | App Store
• Barry Adams: Facebook
• The Father's Love Letter: Website 
• FatherHeart.tv:  Website

Episode Highlights

Forgiveness as the Path to Experiencing God's Love

• Childhood wounds from earthly parents often shape our ability to perceive and receive God's love.

• Forgiveness is not about dismissing wrongs or excusing harmful behavior but about releasing parents from the expectations they couldn’t meet.

 Barry: “It’s really about us opening our hearts up to receive the maternal love… the parental love of God”

• Barry shares how even notable figures like Martin Luther struggled with the concept of God as a loving Father due to the pain caused by their earthly parents.
• This highlights the importance of forgiveness and seeking the Holy Spirit’s guidance for healing rather than forcing the process.

Overcoming the Perception of Disloyalty in Forgiveness

• Forgiving parents is not about dishonoring their sacrifice. Instead, it is about freedom from emotional ties that hinder spiritual growth.
• Barry shares an example of a woman who overcame feelings of shame in her relationship with God by forgiving her father for unknowingly making her feel undeserving.
• The Holy Spirit will naturally reveal areas in need of forgiveness, rather than forcing the process.
• Forgiveness breaks unhealthy “horizontal” ties with earthly parents, enabling a deeper “vertical” connection with God.
• Barry himself forgave his alcoholic father, which freed him from past judgments and allowed him to fully experience God’s unconditional love.

The Dual Nature of God's Love: Paternal and Maternal

• God’s love embodies both fatherly and motherly qualities, reflecting the fullness of His care and compassion.
• Isaiah 66:13 demonstrates the maternal side of God’s love, and compares His comfort to that of a mother comforting her child.
• Isaiah 49:15 assures that even if a mother forgets her child, God will never forget His people.
• Barry explains that humans are designed to flourish under the nurturing embrace of both motherly and fatherly love.

Barry: “When we begin to understand what the Father has for us, it was meant to come through a mother's love and a father's love. So it's like two wings of the same bird that we were meant to thrive in a loving, healthy parental love experience between a mother and a father”

• King David exemplifies this truth, finding his identity in God’s perfect love even in the face of earthly parental shortcomings.

The Cry of the Human Heart: Knowing the Father

• Barry reflects on John 14:8, where Philip expresses the universal human longing: “Show us the Father, and it will be enough.”
• Humanity’s deepest longing is to know and be satisfied by God as a loving Father.
• Barry emphasizes that Jesus came to be the image of the invisible God, perfectly reflecting the Father’s love and nature in everything He said and did.
• This divine love addresses the foundational need of every person to be loved at their core.

Barry: “Our need for parental love is connected directly with the foundational need that we've all had to be loved at the very core of our being… that perfect love that we were created to experience can only come from one source, and that is through knowing Jesus”

About Barry Adams

Barry Adams is the creator of The Father's Love Letter, a globally recognized compilation of biblical verses that communicates the profound and unconditional love of God as a Father. For over 25 years, Barry has been sharing this message of love, touching the lives of millions worldwide through his writings, talks, and teachings. Alongside his wife, Barry has had the privilege of witnessing countless transformations, as people from all walks of life discover their true identity and worth in God’s love. His work has become a powerful tool for spiritual healing and growth, emphasizing that God's love is the foundation upon which all aspects of life should rest.

With a passion for helping others break free from performance-driven anxiety and shame, Barry’s teachings focus on the importance of living from a place of rest in God's love rather than striving for approval. His journey, shaped by his own struggles to meet societal and familial expectations, inspires those who feel burdened by similar pressures. Through his ministry, Barry continues to guide others toward the revelation that they are loved simply because they exist, offering hope and freedom to all who seek it.

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